Do you ever feel like your kids won’t leave you alone?
I sure do.
We have nine or ten awesome kids so our house is always jumping and jiving. But sometimes I feel like I just need a break. How about you?
I’ve spent almost 20 years of my life being a dad and I’ve asked this question more than once. How can I get some time alone? Or even better, alone with my wife (that’s for another post).
Here’s 5 things I’ve done so my kids will leave me alone.
1. LOOK THEM IN THE EYE.
How many times have you been doing something important, like looking at the score of the baseball game on your phone, when a little kid starts pulling on your shirt? “Dad! Dad! Dad! Dad!”
It’s happened to me many times.
What I’ve noticed is that when I put my device down, kneel down and look them in the eye, they stop calling me. When I give them my attention.
Kids need our attention. When they talk, they want us to listen.
Get down on the floor and look your kids in the eye.
2. ANSWER WITH “YES”
When you’re looking them in the eye, ask them what they need. Sometimes it’s a quick question like “Can I have a piece of birthday cake for breakfast?” (You know the answer to that one).
Other times they want to do something with you. Last weekend my boys saw an article in a magazine about making your own bow and arrows. You can guess what they asked me to do with them. So I grabbed my axe, we did some scouting and we cut some branches off a dead tree near our house. We got some carving knives and started whittling away.
The next time your kids ask to do something try answering with a “YES!”
3. ASK THEM WHAT THEY WANT TO DO.
Have you ever had this conversation with someone?
“What do you want to do?”
“I don’t know, what do you want to do?”
“Whatever, what do you want to do?”
You get the point. Why not surprise your kids and ask them what they want to do?
I take my kids out on dates every now and then to get some one-on-one time with them. Sometimes I know what we’re going to do and sometimes I ask them what they want to do.
Earlier this year my boys wanted to go to Cabella’s to spend some of the money they earned. To Cabella’s we went!
Try asking them what they want to do. I dare you.
4. CHANGE YOUR MIND.
I once heard Dave Ramsey say that if you needed to change…just change. He clapped his hands together when he said it. It was a bit annoying actually. But memorable.
I had to change my mind and stop looking at my kids like they were stealing me away from what I really needed to do (check the baseball score).
Time flies. Make every moment count.
If that means you need to change your mind then take Dave Ramsey’s advice: change.
5. GET UP EARLY OR STAY UP LATE
This has helped me a lot. I go through seasons of life where I naturally get up early and seasons where I seem to stay up later.
I use those times when the house is quiet to do the things I want to do. Unfortunately I don’t get much drum practice done at those times. But I do read, listen to podcasts, and let’s be honest, watch videos of cars being dropped on giant axe heads.
This morning or night time is a great time to get away from your kids.
But I don’t think that’s what you really want is it? I believe you like being with your kids. I believe God created them to be with you and you to be with them. To love them and lead them.
You’ve got what it takes to be a great dad for your kids. Get your alone time because that’s what you need. But invest in your kids too.
That’s what they need.